Diana Rodriguez Wallach

This blog has moved

2010-04-28T09:14:00.001-04:00

This blog is now located at http://blog.dianarodriguezwallach.com/.
You will be automatically redirected in 30 seconds, or you may click here.

For feed subscribers, please update your feed subscriptions to
http://blog.dianarodriguezwallach.com/feeds/posts/default.

Cinderella Kicks Off Her Slippers for GCC Member Kay Cassidy

2010-04-21T12:32:00.002-04:00

You gotta love an empowering twist on an old fairy tale, where instead of Cinderella stumbling upon her destiny, she’s asked to join a secret society and fight for it. Girl power! And that’s exactly why I’m excited for GCC Member Kay Cassidy’s (www.kaycassidy.com) new novel, THE CINDERELLA SOCIETY, which debuts this month through Egmont U.S.A.

As always, here’s a little bit about her book to get you hooked:

What a girl to do when the glass slipper fits, but she doesn't want to wear it anymore?

Sixteen year old Jess Parker has always been an outsider. So when she receives an invitation to join The Cinderella Society, a secret society of the most popular girls in school, it's like something out of a fairy tale. Swept up by the Cindys' magical world of makeovers, and catching the eye of her Prince Charming, Jess feels like she's finally found her chance to fit in.

Then the Wickeds--led by Jess's arch-enemy--begin targeting innocent girls in their war against the Cindys, and Jess discovers there's more to being a Cindy than reinventing yourself on the outside. She has unknowingly become part of a centuries-old battle of good vs. evil, and now the Cindys in charge need Jess for a mission that could change everything.

Overwhelmed, Jess wonders if The Cinderella Society made a mistake in choosing her. Is it a coincidence her new boyfriend doesn't want to be seen with her in public? And is this glamorous, secret life even what she wants, or will she risk her own happy ending to live up to the expectations of her new sisters?

Here’s what Kay had to say:

Q: In AMOR AND SUMMER SECRETS, Mariana discovers a hidden family secret. Are you a good secret keeper?

Kay: I'm good at keeping other people's secrets but I tend to be terrible at keeping my own. LOL! I always swear I'm going to keep it secret and then spring the news on everyone at the same time but I always fold and need to share a squee moment with someone I love. :-)

Q: What is the favorite place you ever traveled to, and what was the coolest thing you saw/did there?

Kay: My all-time favorite vacation was when my husband and I spent a week in San Juan. The hotel we stayed at is no longer there but the rooms were in low buildings that were literally steps from a grassy patch with a hammock and the beach. It was heaven. We went to the Arecibo Observatory while we were there which was amazing. It's the world's largest radiotelescope, so if there's life out there beyond Earth, Arecibo is likely the place we would discover it. My husband and I both loved the movie Contact and the observatory is in the movie, so it was neat to see it in person.

I've been to that observatory! It's not that far from Utuado, where my dad (and my character's dad) is from.

Q: I often tell the story of how a psychic once predicted that I would go on to write children’s books. Have you ever visited a psychic?

Kay: I have! One of my favorite stores for my angel collection has them and I'll go in with a friend whenever she's in town. More often than not, they've been right even though I would've sworn they were totally off base given how my life was at that point. :-)

Q: My character Mariana spends her summer in Puerto Rico connecting with her father’s heritage. Have you ever researched your family tree?

Kay: Yay, Puerto Rico! My dad went through a massive genealogy phase and traced our ancestry back to Josephine, the wife of Napolean. He even has a database where he scanned in only photos to associate with people's entries… it was probably a decade long project for him. So I'm fortunate that his side of the family is completely done. And honestly, after seeing the painstaking efforts he went through, I gave up after only documenting a few generations of my mom's side. It's a daunting task!

Q: Where were you when you found out that your book was going to be published?
Kay: I was at home when I got a call from my agent. It was the day after an editor who had been championing the book for two months in-house had called to say it was finally passed over at acquisitions. I was crushed and certain the book was never going to sell. So naturally, my agent called the next morning with an offer from another publisher. That's so like life, isn't it? ;-)

Thank you, Kay! Now, everyone go out and buy books, lots and lots of books!

Breaking News: Young Adult Novels Are Not About The Parents

2010-04-14T12:11:00.004-04:00

This may come as a surprise to the folks over at the New York Times (I know they have their hands full trying not to become extinct and all), but really, if they’re going to publish essays about a genre of literature, they really should know something about it. And I don’t mean skimming the latest titles on the bestseller list and then using those five or six books to make sweeping generalizations about the thousands of others on the shelf.

I’m referring to the essay, The Parent Problem in Young Adult Lit, that recently appeared in the Book Review. The overall thesis seems to be that in the good ‘ole days, parents in children’s books at least had the good sense to be dead, leading to the “triumphant rise” of the orphan. But now, for shame, the “hapless parents” in young adult novels are “afflicted by anomie, sitting down to another dismal meal, or rushing out the door to a meeting,” which makes them “slightly ridiculous.”

The essayist backed up this conclusion by citing six, count ‘em six, contemporary young adult novels: Once Was Lost; How to Say Goodbye in Robot; Twilight; Wintergirls; Shiver; and The Hunger Games. Out of those six titles, she doesn’t even bother to give a single example from either Shiver or The Hunger Games. So really, the entire essay is based on four books.

I don’t know about you, but I think that qualifies her for an F on most college campuses. You can’t just cherry pick a few titles to back up your thesis while ignoring the dozens (hundreds) of titles that contradict it. She doesn’t give one example of a contemporary YA novel with functioning, engaged parents, as if they don’t exist—a fact I can easily back up with my own young adult series. (Hey, there are three books in the Amor and Summer Secrets series, so that should be enough to prove my point, right?)

But even putting the essayist’s poor research aside, and even accepting that the trend of the “hapless parent” exists in contemporary YA, I still don’t see the problem with this depiction. There are plenty of bad parents out there. There are plenty of teens reading and empathizing with a character whose dad is always working, or whose mother is in rehab, or whose parent can’t cook a decent dinner.

While these characters might seem “ridiculous” to a The New York Times essayist, I doubt they do to thousands of teenagers.

It’s as if the essayist lacks a basic understanding of contemporary teens as well as young adult literature. Because clearly, she doesn’t have much of a grasp on the genre if she’s actually wondering why YA parental characters are “less consequential…the father in Once Was Lost becomes somehow peripheral, his problems more muted and less interesting than his teenage daughter’s.”

Um, wow. You think?

Young adult novels are told through the eyes of a teenager. They’re also most often told in the first person. Of course that teen’s problems seem more “consequential” than the parents. We’re purposely only getting the teenager’s point-of-view—that’s sort of what makes a novel fit the young adult genre. But really, do I need to explain that to a New York Times reporter? Because that’s like explaining why mystery novels are plot driven or why fantasy novels have so many funky names. You would think the folks at the Book Review would kind of get that already.

But you know, whatever. I guess I’ll just go back to writing my WIP about the hapless single dad of two teenager daughters who has the audacity to pull double shifts to put a roof over their head. You know, how ridiculous.

POP CULTURE RANT: Glee & Jessica Simpson
Okay, I love Glee. Fine family fun! But last night, there was one line in particular that had me screaming at the TV. It was when Finn looked up at his basketball coach and said, “He pulled a ‘Jessica Simpson.’ You know, lost his fiancé, gained 40 pounds, and stopped showering. And everyone acts like it’s totally normal.” Say it with me: Jessica Simpson IS NOT FAT. Not even close. Yes, at one point she lost a ton of weight to shrink to a freakish size 0 to play Daisy Duke. But the fact that she chose to return to a more normal size 4, does not make her fat. Yes, there was that unfortunate mom jeans picture. But even then, she probably wasn’t more than a size 6. So, get over it! Stop picking on her weight, Hollywood. Or instead of being one of the world’s fattest nations, our next generation is going to be the most anorexic nation. And historians will trace the epidemic’s roots all the way back to the mom jeans.

Bullies Are Lame, And We're Gonna Prove It

2010-04-07T11:43:00.005-04:00

I’m sure many of you have been following the tragic Phoebe Prince story, the smart, attractive teen who took her own life in response to, essentially, being bullied to death. Nine classmates have been charged with her death, and I can’t help but wonder how many of them were tormenting Phoebe with no real idea as to even why she’d become their target. Now they’re facing prison, forced to live with the death of their classmate hanging over their souls forever, all because they wanted to be part of the “in” crowd.

You see, that’s how bullying really survives. Out of those nine teens, I’d venture to guess that only one, maybe two, could be described as a real ringleader—a person full of hate who truly took joy out of watching Phoebe suffer. I’d say the other seven or eight teens involved were merely going along, sending hateful text messages and Facebook posts, just to get their own warped sense of attention. They thought it was “cool” to bully Phoebe.

And that’s where our problem lies. Bullying someone, going along with the group, doing something you know down to your bones is wrong, IS NOT COOL.

It’s not cool to be too afraid to think for yourself.

It’s not cool to be too weak to stand up to your friends .

It’s not cool to torment a girl just because you’re afraid that if it’s not Phoebe who’s getting attacked, then it might be you.

Think about that: about seven or eight of those teens are facing orange jumpsuits and being forced to forever live with the fact that they caused another girl’s death all because they wanted to be "cool."

So in an effort to really lift the stigma of bullying, to show how lame and damaging it is, a group of us young adult authors have joined an important new cause: YAAAB.

Young Adult Authors Against Bullying (YAAAB) is a new group (friend it on Facebook) founded by YA authors Carrie Jones and Megan Kelley Hall. There are more than 50 authors in the group, myself included, with the goal of making sure every teen out there knows how uncool bullying is.

Because here’s the thing, we’ve all gone through it. All of us. In fact, we have so many personal bullying stories that we’re putting together an anthology to tell our tales. We want teens to know what we went through growing up, how vividly we still remember it, and how it affects us to this day. Because, believe me, it does.

So join YAAAB. Agree to make your classroom, your group of friends, your sports team, a no bullying zone. And promise that the next time you see a kid being teased, you won’t just walk by and ignore it. Think of Phoebe and think of all the classmates who saw what was happening everyday and did nothing. Say something.

Because standing up for someone, and something you believe in, is what really makes you cool.

POP CULTURE RANT: Philadelphia Eagles
I can’t believe they actually did it. I can’t believe they traded McNabb. There have been rumors for years that this could happen. But it was just gossip. I never thought they’d really cut him loose. But they did. And on Easter Sunday no less. Now, let me go on the record saying that I am a McNabb fan. I own his jersey. And even if he does throw a few too many passes in the dirt, I think when the dust settles on the football fields of history, this city will look back and realize he was the best quarterback we’ve ever had. Kolb is going to choke this season (yes, I said it), and we’re all going to spiral back to the sad years reminiscent of Rich Kotite or Koy Detmer and sadly gain the hindsight to appreciate the McNabb and Reid era for how great it really was. Wow, “was.” We’ll miss you, McNabb! See you twice a year with the Redskins!

In a World… Where Blurbs Rule

2010-03-31T12:34:00.002-04:00

To blurb or not to blurb, that is the question. You’ve probably noticed on the back of many books there are little excerpts from other authors claiming it’s “laugh out loud funny!” or “two tissue box worthy!” or “fun and full of heart!” Authors are usually responsible for asking other authors to write these blurbs on their behalf. So if you don’t know many writers, you often don’t get many blurbs. (Remember the puppy dog eyes you had when you stood at someone’s locker and asked, “Will you sign my yearbook?” It’s like that.)

But thankfully, in the age of Twitter, Blogger, Facebook, MySpace, LiveJournal, GoodReads, etc., authors have more opportunities to “meet” each other in the strictly WiFi sense. This leads to me being asked via Twitter to blurb an awesome new novel by a popular Latina author.

So after reading an ARC of Goodbye to All That by Margo Candela and loving it, I was then forced to ponder the age-old question:

How do I write a blurb?

Do I go with the James Earl Jones version?
In a world… where movie stars rule the planet, one girl must face them all or risk doing temp work…FOREVER.

Do I go with the Siskel & Ebert version?
Two Thumbs Up! Fine, chick-lit fun! A book your girlfriends will love.

Do I go with the Time Magazine “By the Numbers” version?
300 pages
16 chapters
3 dog-eared pages
Countless laughs

Or do I just go with the straight-up version? Yeah, that’s what I thought too. So ultimately, I went with this:

“Bridget Jones meets Entourage in this witty, L.A. story that lets you behind the velvet ropes and inside one of ‘the industry’s’ cut-throat boardrooms. Readers will be rooting for Raquel Azorian, a realistic heroine full of flaws and self-reliance. Plus, she’s funny. Candela spins dialogue so sharp it will have you wishing she were standing nearby with cue cards at your next office meeting. A great, enjoyable read.”

So I hope you guys check it out when it debuts. Good luck with the launch, Margo!

POP CULTURE RANT: American Idol

Okay, it’s official. It’s not just me, this season blows. For the first time ever, I skipped the entire audition round (just wasn’t into it), but I did watch one round of the semi-finals. I wasn’t impressed. When they narrowed it down to the final 12, I thought it was safe to trust that the talent had been limited to only the most watchable. I was wrong. I have watched 2.5 episodes of the finals now and so far, only 2ish people deserve to be there (Crystal, ½ Lee, and ½ Siobhan, depending on the night). The rest are awful, like Season 1 “Goodbye Yellow Brick Road” awful. Simon, I think when you leave next season, so will the rest of us.

Latest Project: Channeling My Inner Tarantino

2010-03-23T11:46:00.002-04:00

So you know how I’ve been blogging about my Adventures in Prequeldom? Well, I regret to inform you that prequeldom is on hold for the moment. But don’t worry, this is a good thing! (Though it’s not easy to stop when you’re 30,000 words into a novel. Insert sound of tires screeching to a halt.) Essentially, my middle grade WIP is getting a new spark of life. Specifically, I’ve decided to chop the book into pieces and paste it together into a fractured timeline in a manner similar to Reservoir Dogs—only without all the guns and sliced ears.

For those who haven’t seen Quentin Tarantino’s debut flick, it’s not for the faint of heart. (Seriously, it takes cursing and violence to a whole new level—I’m not joking about that ear.) But one of the less disturbing (awesome) things it does amazing well is tell its story in a nonlinear fashion. The film jumps around recapping the events right before and right after a bank robbery, without showing the robbery itself. It sounds kind of crazy, but it’s actually quite awesome.

And while making my latest revisions to my middle grade novel, I came to appreciate Tarantino’s style of thinking. The WIP already featured snippets of timeline jumping. Throughout the book (which is told from four different girls’ points of view), the story would jump to the height of the action and then rewind a bit to tell the reader how we got there.

So, the thread of timeline jumping was there already.

I’ve just deciding to split that thread in two.

Now, instead of finding out what happens to Deirdre, Amber, Allie, and Becca as their friendships slowly (or drastically) shatter, we see what happens right before and right after one of the major “incidents” in the book.

Sound confusing? Try laying it out in notecards.

Now, believe me, I debated giving an excerpt here. I even cut and pasted one in. But I just don’t think I’m ready. These things take time.

But, I will tell you that ultimately, my big writerly intention here is to show how four girls are affected differently by the same social events, because they’re seeing them through an entirely selfish light. (They’re 13, what do you expect?). So by adding the new timeline, it takes their viewpoints out of context, making their different perspectives even more drastic (because the reader hasn’t gotten to experience the “incident” in question). At least not yet.

Think of it like Lost, the answers are coming…

POP CULTURE RANT: General Hospital
I have mixed emotions about Kristina’s domestic abuse storyline. A) I like that it ties in lots of different cast members. B) I like that it’s not mob-related. (Don’t we all?) C) I like how all the actors seem to stepping up their game (Alexis, Kristina, and Sonny have been great). BUT, having a teenage girl depicted as lying about who abused her just seems irresponsible to me. It’s like they’re sending a message to families that they shouldn’t trust their daughters when they come forward about being attacked, because they might lie. And that’s a horrible, horrible message to suggest. Now, I know, soap operas aren’t there to teach us behavioral tips. (What, you can’t slap people in the face during boardroom disputes?). But still, it might have worked better if Kristina was in a coma and no one knew who abused her, so they blamed Ethan at first. Then Keiffer. Just sayin’…

Meet a New BFF in GCC Member Elizabeth Scott

2010-03-16T11:15:00.007-04:00

Ever have a crush on your best friend’s boyfriend? Of course not. Because even if you did, you wouldn’t tell me. It’s a blatant violation of Girl Code. And that is exactly the topic that our newest GCC member Elizabeth Scott tackles in her new young adult novel, THE UNWRITTEN RULE, which debuts today through Simon Pulse.

As always, here’s a little bit about her book to get you hooked:

Everyone knows the unwritten rule: You don't like you best friend's boyfriend. Sarah has had a crush on Ryan for years. He's easy to talk to, supersmart, and totally gets her. Lately it even seems like he's paying extra attention to her. Everything would be perfect except for two things: Ryan is Brianna's boyfriend, and Brianna is Sarah's best friend. Sarah forces herself to avoid Ryan and tries to convince herself not to like him. She feels so guilty for wanting him, and the last thing she wants is to hurt her best friend. But when she's thrown together with Ryan one night, something happens. It's wonderful...and awful.

Sarah is torn apart by guilt, but what she feels is nothing short of addiction, and she can't stop herself from wanting more...

Here’s what Elizabeth had to say:

Q: In AMOR AND SUMMER SECRETS, Mariana discovers a hidden family secret. Are you a good secret keeper?

Elizabeth: I'm a great secret keeper---if you tell me something and ask me to not tell anyone, I won't.

Q: What is the favorite place you ever traveled to, and what was the coolest thing you saw/did there?

Elizabeth: My favorite place in the world is Wales, especially North Wales, and I loved everything about it when I visited.

I think the coolest thing I saw there was the ruins of a castle because you could actually walk through them and you could just sense what it had been like once upon a time.

Q: I often tell the story of how a psychic once predicted that I would go on to write children’s books. Have you ever visited a psychic?

Elizabeth: I haven't ever visited a psychic and I don't think I ever would because I'm pretty skeptical of just about everything. Which isn't always for the best, but it's how I am!

Q: My character Mariana spends her summer in Puerto Rico connecting with her father’s heritage. Have you ever researched your family tree?

Elizabeth: My family is obsessed with genealogy and I have to be honest, I got bored of hearing about it by the time I was about six.

How obsessed are they? Let's put it this way: not only do we have a family reunion every year, we have multiple family cemeteries that my family has created funds to maintain. (!)

Q: Where were you when you found out that your book was going to be published?

Elizabeth: For my first book, Bloom, I was at home. For my latest, The Unwritten Rule, I was also at home. (!) When I made my first sale, I didn't believe it was real until I talked to my editor for the first time. For The Unwritten Rule--well, the joy never wears off, but the waiting to find out, weirdly enough, gets harder for me with each book!

Thank you, Elizabeth! Now, everyone go out and buy books, lots and lots of books!

Old Lady Rodriguez’ Guide to Email Etiquette

2010-03-10T12:34:00.004-05:00

Well, you can thank the DH for the title to this blog because when I went into a rant yesterday on the flurry of rude emails I’d received he told me I was turning into “Old Lady Rodriguez.” Though I prefer to think of myself as Kramer in that Seinfeld episode when he puts in the screen door and starts screaming at those damn kids in his apartment building. Anyway, I have issues with impolite electronic communications.

This includes all forms: text, email, Twitter, MySpace, you name it. Now don’t get me wrong, I am not technology averse. I love these forms of communication and am addicted to some of them. But I’m polite. Emily Post taught me well. And since she’s not alive to teach the younger generation (well, I think there’s actually someone from her estate still writing books in her name, but whatever), I’ve decided to assume the role.

Please take into account that this blog does not apply to fan letters. Fans can send me communications in any tone of voice they want, because fans are awesome and I love them. Send me smoke signals, and I’ll still be thrilled.

But for all others, behold….

Old Lady Rodriguez’ Guide to Email Etiquette

1. Introduce yourself. If I did not go to high school with you, if you are not my old college chum, if we do not share blood, then it is safe to say you are contacting me in a professional capacity. We don’t share pints at the pub. So if you email me, especially if it’s for the first time and I don’t know you, then say hello (not “What up!”), write in complete sentences, and leave a closing (with your name).

2. Say thank you. If I take the time to proofread your manuscript, give you a referral, edit your query, introduce you to a contact, then the next time you contact me, say thank you. It doesn’t need to be calligraphied on parchment; a simple “Thank you for your help” is just as nice. Think karma.

3. Don’t use odd slang. Now, I’m not a huge stickler here. You can see that throughout all of my blogs and novels, I use plenty of slang. But in a professional email, think about whether “OMG let’s tweet up, yo!” is really appropriate.

4. Be nice. I may be alone in this, but I think one-line emails are rude. No greeting, no closing, just “Let’s meet” or even worse, “Call me.” If you want to talk to me, then pick up the phone. Don’t send a one-liner with no explanation for the conversation.

5. People forward emails. If you need any more incentive to be a bit more polite, don’t forget that all important “forward” button. Millions of people could see that communication. Don’t believe me? Ask the professor I know who shares every incoherent email he gets from a student with his entire base of friends and family. Take note, college freshmen.

Okay, rant's over. I’m getting off my soapbox now. And I’m sure in a few hours I'll get a bunch of one-liners saying “What up spanky?” in a ALL CAPS and comic sans font. But in the meantime…

Thanks again! I appreciate your time.
Best,
Diana

POP CULTURE RANT: Tik Tok by Kesha

I warned the DH I would be doing this since he titled my blog, but yes, Tik Tok has invaded my husband’s brain. He manages to find it on the radio every time we’re in the car (and that song is on a lot). He even has a little dance, and once he walked into a meeting saying, “The party don’t start ‘til I walk in!” Kesha has gone too far. So I must appeal to DJs everywhere to consider reducing its rotation down from every two seconds, or SNL will soon be doing another sketch like this in its honor.

Adventures in Prequeldom: When Outlines Attack

2010-03-03T11:35:00.002-05:00

I promised that I would blog about the experience of banging my head against my laptop…um, I mean writing my prequel. And since I am a glorious, fantastic, drop-down-on-my-knees-and-give-praise 20,000 words into the prequel, I think I’m ready to dispel with the words of wisdom.

The process of getting from “staring at the blank page before me” to 20K goes a little something like this:

Prequel, How Not To Lose Sanity While Writing

Step 1 – Break book into acts. The first 20,000 words for me represent Act 1. It’s just like a play. I put an initiating incident and mini climax into each act as I build to the ultimate climax and dénouement at the end. For this book, I have three acts planned.

Step 2 – Stare at your pretty outline with three clearly defined, color-coded acts and feel proud. This is particularly important for me because I’m not an outliner, so I expect applause and a standing ovation for this feat.

Step 3 – Place bulletin board with clearly defined, color-coded acts in front of your husband’s dresser so every time he has to open a drawer, he has to move it. Share the pain.

Step 4 – Transfer the clearly defined, color-coded notes for Act 1 into an artist sketchbook in “Mind Map” format and keep sketchbook by laptop while writing. This is where I add additional color-coded notes to the outline to identify things I’ve changed while writing. (I change a lot. Outlines are made to be broken.)

Step 5 – Watch a rerun of Buffy and marvel at the awesome dialogue. “Make with the happy, people.”

Step 6 – Write first chapter. Read first chapter. Rewrite first chapter. Read first chapter. Repeat, repeat, repeat. (I don’t know why but I always spend a lot of time reworking Chapter Numero Uno before I move on. It sets the whole tone of the book—the voice, the characters, the everything. It’s important.)

Step 7 – Force yourself to write between 1,500 to 3,000 words per day while listening to the Adult Alternative channel on Comcast Cable.

Step 8 – Dance. No joke. You pound out 3,000 words that day, you stand up and you dance. Trust me on this.

(Yes, all I could find on Youtube was a video with Asian subtitles.)

POP CULTURE RANT: American Idol
I’m still coming out of my Olympic coma and checking out what’s been on TV since before the days of snowboard cross and men’s free skates. And I just caught my first episode of this season’s American Idol. Yeah, not good. I saw the guy’s Top Ten. Or that’s what they claimed, though the only one worth a mention was the David Cook sound-alike at the end. The rest—in the words of Simon— were either “utterly forgettable” or “self indulgent.” A couple actually tried to take Marvin Gaye and Tina Turner songs and “make them better.” Um, yeah, good luck with that.

Nancy Drew and The Mystery of the Haiku Reviews

2010-02-24T14:25:00.005-05:00

I went antiquing over the weekend. Doesn’t that sound grown up? Like I should be sitting in front of a fire sipping a cup of tea from 18th Century china while resting my feet on an early American leather ottoman. Well, it wasn’t that romantic. Mostly because I was in Maryland.

Not there’s anything wrong with Maryland, it’s just not one of the fancier states in my opinion. Now, if I was antiquing for jewelry in New York or scouring for Civil War artifacts in Georgia, that might be worthy of the Antique Roadshow (sad, that PBS symbolizes the pinnacle of success in this business). But alas, I was looking for lamps and mirrors in Maryland to go in my new house, which is currently buried under snow. (Old Man Winter and I have some issues right now.)

But while immersed in furniture antiquities, I did not forget my day job. Not that I could, those places are swimming in books. And thankfully there are a few Nancy Drew enthusiasts in the area. So I picked up a couple hardbacks to contrast with the more modern versions Simon & Schuster put out after that Emma Roberts movie.

The over-designed paperback Nancy Drews I bought in a box set on clearance at Borders. The others I bought for $2/piece at antique stores, one of which (the blue one in the middle), was published somewhere during 1942-1945 (you can tell by the really poor quality, we-can-barely-afford-tree-pulp-because-we’re-at-War paper). The rest are from the ‘60s and 70s.

I’m not really a book collector (unless you count signed YA novels), put I’m rather pleased with my new Nancy Drew shelf, which corresponds to the other mysteries I’ve been reading as research as of late.

And this of course brings to me to more….

MYSTERIOUS HAIKU REVIEWS

NANCY DREW (multiple novels), Carolyn Keene
Love those ghost writers
They created an icon
who now says “You know..”

THE ADVENTURES OF SHERLOCK HOLMES, Arthur Conan Doyle
A coke-snorting sleuth
with super intuition
Mentalist rip off

CASINO ROYALE, A JAMES BOND NOVEL, Ian Fleming
Will shag any girl
but will not notice her brain
Until he’s tortured

VALENTINE’S DAY, the movie
Cute, okay chick flick
If we just had that gay kiss
to rival Brokeback…

POP CULTURE RANT: Ice Skating
I hate this new scoring system. It makes it virtually impossible for people at home to understand what a good score is. One skater gets 152, another 172—is that a big difference? An insurmountable difference? What’s a perfect score? Is perfection even possible? I miss the days of the standard 6.0s. And I miss when judges weren’t using a 400-percent zoom on a skate to determine whether a jump was a good. It just doesn’t seem much in the spirit of the Olympics. What’s next? Penalty flags when they don’t finish a rotation?

What Olympians Can Teach Us Dear Writers

2010-02-17T12:26:00.006-05:00

During the Summer Olympics (God, I can’t believe I’ve been blogging that long), I wrote a blog comparing my writing style to water polo. It’s oddly, to this day, one of my most read blogs ever, so I’m taking it that I have a lot of Olympic fans out there. And since I’m obsessed with the Games, have watched every minute, and I tear up every time I see a montage about an athlete’s search for “redemption,” I’ve decided to expand upon the topic.

Let’s face it, we’ve got some hardcore sob stories here. The Canadian skier racing in honor of his disabled brother. The American snowboarder famous for a hotdog move gone bad who came seeking respect. The 30-plus-year-old Chinese figure skaters with a Romeo & Juliet love story. Apolo speed skating rather than dancing (wait, he’s not just that guy who tangoed with Julianne Hough?). The Russian male figure skater hoping to squash his “enemies” like an evil secret agent.

So in honor of these athletes (who remind me of USA Network’s “Characters Welcome!”), I’ve decided to extrapolate what we as writers can learn from their personal histories.

Alexandre Bilodeau
If that older brother of his can defy the odds and walk long after people insist it’s impossible, then we can all get the heck out of bed and write 3,000 words per day. Writers have a gift not that dissimilar to athletes. Only we don’t run laps and drink wheat juice to train, we sit ourselves in a chair, alone, with no coach, and force ourselves to pound out those words. It’s hard work and athletes do it for years, every day, before anyone acknowledges their efforts. Sound familiar?

Lindsey Jacobellis
Just because you think you’ve earned respect, and just because you try as hard as you possibly can, you don’t always get what you think you deserve. Hers would have been the ultimate story of redemption, she could have shown the world how much she’d grown these past four years, but still she fell short. Sometimes, you don’t always get what you want when you want it. So anyone out there querying agents, or sitting on submission, think of Lindsey and then watch that Dan Jansen Visa commercial. Because if you work hard enough and don’t give up, your time will come, you just can’t control when.

Shen Xue and Zhao Hongbo
Sometimes it’s nice to have someone you love beside you when you fight for your dreams. Whether it’s a spouse, a friend, a parent, or a sibling, having someone tell you repeatedly not to give up can make all the difference.

Apolo Anton Ohno
Even when you’re in fourth place, getting shoved and elbowed farther back, watching person after person pass you by as they soar closer to the goal you’re trying to achieve, sometimes the unforeseen happens. There’s a little bit of luck involved everything, whether it’s winning a short track race or getting a book deal. But you have to be there prepared, well trained, and ready to take advantage of that luck when it comes your way.

Evgeni Plushenko
If you guys do all of the above and do reach the pinnacle of your career, sometimes people just aren’t going to like you. It could be an Olympic competitor or an Amazon reviewer. So you can either take those comments in stride and appreciate that they come with the success you’ve worked so hard for, or you can make a video montage that makes you seem like an evil Bond Villain bent on destroying your “enemies” with a death ray. Either works.

POP CULTURE RANT: Starbucks
Okay mega coffee house, I give you props for finally creating a system to give frequent visitors free Internet access (if you don’t yet have their loyalty card, get it). But for the love of God, when did you start playing a mind-numbing mix of Easy Listening and Golden Oldies? Maybe it’s the switch from the city location to the ‘burbs, or maybe you’re going through an awkward phase, but I can’t tell you how hard it is to work when a loud, unbearably annoying version of the “When Saints Come Marching In” is blaring in a speaker above your head.

How I Spent My Snowtorious Birthday

2010-02-11T10:55:00.006-05:00

I was born in a blizzard, and I have now come to realize that this was an omen for birthdays to come. I had many an elementary school party canceled because of snow. I was stranded in NYC once when my husband and I went to see Wicked. I got stuck shoveling my sister’s driveway one year when we went to tour D.C. So I am aware that snow and February 10th go hand in hand. But nothing—absolutely nothing—can compare to the “Snowpocalypse,” “Snowmaggedon,” or “Unusually Large Snowstorm” (as The Daily Show said) that occurred yesterday.

All of my sad little birthday messages from friends and family were like, “Hope you’re not shoveling on your birthday!” “Hope you asked for a blizzard for your birthday!” or “Snow My God! It’s your birthday!”

So what do you do when your area is blanketed with 17 inches of snow on top of the 56 inches you’ve already gotten this winter? Well, I’ll show you. But first a moment of silence for the birthday plans that should’ve been…

Here’s What I Had Planned to Do Yesterday For My Birthday:

Eat an awesome brunch in a South Philly restaurant that usually has a 45 minute wait.

Visit my new house, which is still under construction but which might have our bathroom tiles now installed.

Shop for cute antiques to put in said new house by perusing the store’s on Pine Street.

And finally have a romantic dinner at Buddakhan with a charming candle placed in my fancy dessert.

Here’s What I Actually Did on My Birthday:

Made up for a lost day at the gym by shoveling snow that weighed more than I do.

Danced on top of a snowdrift compiled by all the snow we shoveled.

Took time to read the paper.

Attempted to make a snow angel only to realize despite gym efforts my legs could not push that much snow.

So there you have it! This will truly, unmistakably, be a birthday I will never forget. And thanks to “Those Who Will House Me ‘Til Then” for the special birthday breakfast and the candles in the cranberry bread. We’ll make up for the lost festivities this weekend!

POP CULTURE RANT: The Oscars
Anyone else think it’s beyond silly that there are 10 movies up for Best Picture? The cartoon Up is nominated? And The Blind Side? Really? Now, I’m not doubting these are good movies. But best of the year? It kind of takes the prestige out of the nomination if nine of your closest friends get nominated too. Don’t get me wrong, I typically am not a fan of any of the movies nominated for Oscar’s Best Picture. But I can still appreciate the quality of the film and the style of movie associated with such an honor. We have the Golden Globes to recognize the best comedies, and the MTV Awards to recognize the best blockbusters. Leave the Oscars to the indie films, like ‘em or not they deserve it.

How to Write a Prequel and Not Go Crazy

2010-02-05T12:10:00.002-05:00

You ever wonder why in the world bizillionare George Lucas would create the mind-numbingly awful character of Jar Jar Binx? I think I know why. Not that I can relate to the mountains of cash Lucas sits on while drumming up these wild ideas, but I’m starting see how writing a prequel can make you cat poop crazy (I don’t like bats).

Here’s why:

You’ve already written the next book.

Seems obvious, even helpful. At first.

Consider all the perks: you know your characters, you know how they speak, how they think, what would do or not do in any given situation. You know exactly where the story is going. These are valuable steps in the writing process.

Here’s the part that makes you long for a padded cell:

You’ve already determined exactly where the story is going.

See how I’m talking in circles here? It’s kind of like the quantum physics lessons in Lost: on one level, your brain is wrapped around them; on the other, your eyes are glazing over.

Because writing a prequel is not that different from jumping around in time with a bloody nose (sometimes I think my laptop and I are on that island). A prequel jumps you forward, so that everything you now write has to get to the end result that you’ve already determined. If your character makes one bad decision, the actions of the next book no longer make sense (nor do those scenes you love so much).

It’s really hard, and for some reason, I’m setting off on the journey anyway.

Don’t get me wrong. My process is not nearly as complicated, or glamorous, as George Lucas’. The novel I’m prequelling (yes, I made that word up) hasn’t been published yet. (If this book has to go out posthumously from my grave, ANASTASIA will see the light of day.)

But to prove that I will never give up on her (yes, I think Anastasia’s a real person) and that I will not rest until her story is told, I am taking my mother’s advice, splitting my book into two, and writing myself one heck of a prequel. I’ve even tackled an outlining process I’ve never attempted before (mostly because I’ve never outlined before, I’m more of an organic writer).

See, mom! There are notecards and everything:

I’m only a few thousand words in, but to keep myself sane until I reach “the end,” and to not make “Those Who Will House Me ‘Til Then” regret housing me during this process, I’ve decided to blog about my Adventures in Prequeldom (yes, I made that word up too). Stay tuned and hope I don’t ever get to the point where Jar Jar Binx sounds like a really good idea.

POP CULTURE RANT: General Hospital
I think all of us GH fans need to send the original Lucky a thank you note, because he’s resurrected this character of the depths of “I don’t give a crap.” Honestly, until he came back, I could’ve cared less if Elizabeth jumped in bed with half the town. Now, miraculously, I do. And tell me you didn’t all hear those wonderful suggestions of Sonny “losing all legitimate assets,” of “Jason becoming a P.I.,” of Franco preventing them from ever killing again, and not think: Hallelujah! Wouldn’t it be awesome if the mob suddenly ended? If the show went into a different direction? If we got something different for once? Not that I mind a little gun fighting, it would just be nice if the fights weren’t simply part of a recycling program drudging up stories we’ve seen a million times. I say, arrest Sonny and hit the reset button on this sucker.

Become a Smitten Kitten with GCC Member Suzanne Young

2010-02-02T11:54:00.003-05:00

“Mashed potatoes and gravy!” I’m so excited to be talking about GCC member Suzanne Young’s new book, The Naughty List. I read an Advanced Reader Copy, so I can tell you it’s “Holy Canoli!” awesome. It’s written with a very cute and very funny YA voice that’s just going to make you love those cheerleading Sex Kittens. (I mean Smitten Kittens).

As always, here’s a little bit about her book to get you hooked:

As if being a purrfect cheerleader isn’t enough responsibility! Tessa Crimson’s the sweet and spunky leader of the SOS (Society of Smitten Kittens), a cheer squad–turned–spy society dedicated to bringing dastardly boyfriends to justice, one cheater at a time. Boyfriend-busting wouldn’t be so bad . . . except that so far, every suspect on the Naughty List has been proven 100% guilty!

When Tessa’s own boyfriend shows up on the List, she turns her sleuthing skills on him. Is Aiden just as naughty as all the rest, or will Tessa’s sneaky ways end in catastrophe?

Follow the squad online.

Here’s what Suzanne had to say:

Q: In AMOR AND SUMMER SECRETS, Mariana discovers a hidden family secret. Are you a good secret keeper?

Suzanne: Good gravy, I’m terrible at secrets. If you can’t read it on my face, then I’ll probably tell you in five minutes anyway. Imagine Christmas at my house. I walk around giggling all day, asking my husband, “Are you sure you don’t want to know?”

Q: What is the favorite place you ever traveled to, and what was the coolest thing you saw/did there?

Suzanne: I’m still waiting to have that amazing trip abroad. For now, my favorite time was when me, my husband and my kids got in our RV and roadtripped for ten days. We drove down to Disneyland, then Phoenix, then the Grand Canyon and finally Las Vegas. Sure, the last day we almost died in a snowstorm, but the trip was still amazing.

Q: I often tell the story of how a psychic once predicted that I would go on to write children’s books. Have you ever visited a psychic?

Suzanne: I LOVE psychics!! One time when I had my tea leaves read, the woman told me that I’d soon have something happen to my car. Sure enough, when I got outside, someone had smacked it and left a note. Talk about predictions!! Another time I had a psychic tell me never to get on a motorcycle. Later that night, I sort of did. And I’m still here!!

So you don't think the psychic whacked your car herself? :)

Q: My character Mariana spends her summer in Puerto Rico connecting with her father’s heritage. Have you ever researched your family tree?

Suzanne: I’ve never personally researched my family tree. I know my grandmother was Italian and my grandfather was Polish. So my cooking skills consist of lasagna and kielbasa recipes.

Q: Where were you when you found out that your book was going to be published?
Suzanne: This is humiliating. But I recorded this a few days after I found out: http://lipglosslit.blogspot.com/2008/07/suzs-book-deal.html

Too cute!

Thank you, Suzanne! Now, everyone go out and buy books, lots and lots of books!

Bond -vs- Holmes: The Ultimate SmackDown

2010-01-26T11:43:00.004-05:00

So I’ve been brushing up on my mysteries as research for my WIP. Yeah, I know, tough work. I wanted to go with more of a “method” approach, but I thought committing a felony to determine how the cops would handle the case might be the long way to publishing a novel (though these days, who knows?). Instead, I’ve been reading James Bond and Sherlock Holmes.

It’s my first foray into these classics. I mean, I haven’t even watched an entire Bond movie (unless you count Austin Powers). And I had no idea that Sherlock Holmes was a collection of short stories and not a collection of novels (or that they were told from Watson’s point-of-view— curious). So I went into these books cold, and after about 15 minutes of careful deliberation, I’ve come away with who I think is truly the mystery-solving mastermind.

So here it is, my analysis of Casino Royale and The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes:

Bond -vs- Holmes: Two Sleuths Enter, One Sleuth Leaves

1. Holmes is a coke head. No joke! Page two it says Holmes is “buried among his old books, and alternating from week to week between cocaine and ambition…” Maybe Robert Downey Jr. was a good casting choice.

Bond likes his drink, though it’s not a classic martini. It’s an original concoction he created: three parts Gordon’s, one part vodka, a half part Kina Lillet (no idea what that is), shaken until ice cold and topped with a lemon twist.

Point: Bond. Crack is whack.

2. Bond can handle his torture. He gets tied to a chair and is beaten in a very graphic manner. Let’s just say, “yuck.” Though I was surprised this super spy had be rescued not once, but twice in this book.

Holmes isn’t just some wimpy brainiac. He threatens to whip one bad guy with a hunting crop (or cane) and actually does slug another criminal with it. He will mess you up with that walker.

Point: Holmes. Smart and sassy.

3. Holmes is a collection of short stories because it takes the character no more than one page to solve the mysteries. Man can put some pieces together.

Bond is a few steps behind. Yeah, he doesn’t get dead, but that’s mostly out of luck. He’s too busy drinking and wooing women to consider that the bad guys might try a counter attack.

Point: Holmes. I’d say his IQ score is a few points higher.

4. Bond is incredibly misogynistic. And I don’t mean because he’ll shag you, baby (though he never says that). I mean, he actually calls his female partner “a blithering woman who thought she could do a man’s work.” Sexism = not sexy.

So far, Holmes hasn’t spent much time looking at the ladies. Now, I’m not going to say that he and Watson have a little something on the side, but it wouldn’t surprise me if you know what I mean.

Point: Holmes. At least he respects the brawds.

5. Bond has shades of inspiration that I could trace in modern day creations such as: Alias, Taken, 24, the great Austin Powers, and pretty much anything spy-related (he perfected the genre).

Holmes’ near psychic powers of intuition make Psych (on USA) and the Mentalist virtual rip offs. He also could be credited as being one of the first criminal profilers given his psychological analysis of perpetrators. So add Criminal Minds and The Profiler to the list.

Point: Tie. They both warrant every literary allusion they’ve generated.

So there you have it, my entirely scientific comparison of two classic mysteries. Holmes could officially whip Bond’s butt. Mostly because Bond isn’t quite smart enough to see it coming. Though if it ever came to blows, Holmes is dead man. You don’t bring a cane to a gun fight.

Pixies and More with GCC Member Carrie Jones

2010-01-22T11:38:00.002-05:00

Well, if you haven’t read Carrie Jones’ (http://www.carriejonesbooks.com)
NY Times best-seller, NEED, rush out and buy it right now so you’re all caught up and ready to read its sequel, CAPTIVATE. It just debuted this month through Bloomsbury USA and it had one of the prettiest covers ever! Check it out!

As always, here’s a little bit about her book to get you hooked:

In this NYT-Bestselling sequel to NEED, Zara and her friends knew they hadn't solved the pixie problem for good. Far from it. The king's needs grow deeper every day he's stuck in captivity, while his control over his people gets weaker. It's made him vulnerable. And now there's a new king in town.

A turf war is imminent, since the new pixie king, Astley, is moving in quickly. Nick nearly killed him in the woods on day one, but Zara came to his rescue. Astley swears that he and Zara are destined to be together, that he's one of the good guys. Nick isn't buying it, though Zara isn't as sure -- despite herself, she wants to trust the new king. But it's a lot more than her relationship with Nick that is at stake. It's her life -- and his.

Here’s what Carrie had to say:

Q: In AMOR AND SUMMER SECRETS, Mariana discovers a hidden family secret. Are you a good secret keeper?

Carrie: I am. If I let out my family secret…well, let’s just say I’d be in the tabloids. Plus, it’s not really mine to tell, you know? That’s the problem with knowing secrets they start weighing you down.

Q: What is the favorite place you ever traveled to, and what was the coolest thing you saw/did there?

Carrie: Oh man… I love to travel too, but I am so bad at picking favorites. I think Scotland is my favorite place and the coolest thing that happened there was I was staying in this castle. All night long I kept smelling this really strange perfume. I have a wicked nose and I’d literally follow the scent around the hotel room. Then the concierge person told me the next morning that the room was haunted. A kind of similar thing happened in Austin, Texas.

Although the coolest COOLEST thing was probably when I was swimming off the beach in Naples, Florida and all of a sudden a pod of dolphins were swimming all around me. That was beyond cool. I was the only one swimming because it was January and everyone else on the beach was 123 years old. It was probably THE most amazing thing that’s ever happened in my life.

Okay, I'm officially jealous of that dolphin story.

Q: I often tell the story of how a psychic once predicted that I would go on to write children’s books. Have you ever visited a psychic?

Carrie: When I was in high school my mom took me to a psychic fair in Salem, Mass and there were all these psychics sitting at tables. You had to sign up for a psychic. Most had long lines, but this one lady had no line at all. I felt so badly for her, so even though she was giving off this super evil vibe I went to her. She looked at me and said, “You will go crazy and be institutionalized before you’re 30.”

This was so not cool.

I basically just sat there for a minute, trying to be calm and then I left, but this really beautiful man with John Gorka brown eyes waved me over to his table and said, “Whatever she just told you is not true.”

And I was like, gulping back sobs and said, “It isn’t?”

“No,” he says. “She does that.”

And then he offered for me to come in his line for free. I liked his line a lot better. I got to be a reincarnated French noble woman who rode horses along the Seine, and all sorts of cool stuff. Sigh.

My infamous psychic was in Salem too. Oh, those wicked witches.

Q: My character Mariana spends her summer in Puerto Rico connecting with her father’s heritage. Have you ever researched your family tree?

Carrie: I have. My family tree goes back forever, past Charlemagne and Viking kings. It’s kind of daunting because seriously? How do you live up to Charlemagne?

Q: Where were you when you found out that your book was going to be published?

Carrie: Here is the story of my first book, which was TIPS ON HAVING A GAY (ex) BOYFRIEND. It’s more interesting, I think. The story about CAPTIVATE is on my publishers’ website for me. They have an awesome win-a-computer contest there too. You should totally enter.

It begins as all good things do with an email announcing the creation of Flux, an imprint of Llewellyn. Flux was accepting YA novels. Hhm? I thought to myself. I just wrote a YA novel. Sure, I hadn’t shown it to my advisor at Vermont College’s MFA in Writing Program. Sure, I hadn’t let ANYONE read it. Sure, I only just wrote it in the last month and it was rough, rough, rough. But I sent it in. I chugged out a cover letter. I found some stamps. I mailed it.

Here is what followed, taken from my livejournal entries.

Sweet Editor Man called me within a week of me mailing the manuscript. Seriously. It was wild.

The 30th, 2006

Okay. Here’s the big question of the day: Why am I so stupid?

I will work on the self esteem exercises tomorrow… but today! Today! Today I am allowed to realize the full extent of my idiotness. Here’s why.

I sent out some manuscript queries on Thursday. I get a phone call this morning, from a real live editor who says, “Um, is this C.C. Jones?”

“Yes,” I say while pouring out cat food. He then proceeds to tell me he got my query, wants to see more of my manuscript, but his email requesting it bounced back.

“Really?” I say. “That’s weird.”

“Let me tell you the address,” he says. “cjonese at…”

“Oh,” I say. “Oh. Oh. Oh.”

“What?” he says.

“There’s no e on the end of Jones.”

“I didn’t think so,” he says. I then apologize and berate myself for not even being able to spell my own last name! What an idiot. He gives me an email address. I send him the rest of the manuscript.

Yeah, that baby’s going somewhere. Not.

Although, he was kind and he did say, “It’s the manuscript I care about, not your inability to spell your own name.”

Thank you, Carrie! Now, everyone go out and buy books, lots and lots of books!

Stealing Your Ideas, and Other Things I Noticed in Avatar

2010-01-20T13:19:00.003-05:00

Like most people with a pulse, I caught the hype and went out to see Avatar (in 3D Imax!) and I must admit I was pleasantly surprised. I’m not a fantasy person. I only watched half of the first Lord of the Rings movie and hated it. I’ve never read a Harry Potter (and I write YA!). And I don’t even like superhero movies unless they’ve got Hugh Jackman shirtless. So for me to say Avatar was good means something. They converted me. But, it doesn’t mean I was oblivious to the dozen or so movies they ripped off in the process.

Let me explain. All writers steal stuff (subconsciously or consciously) from other works of art: books, movies, tv shows, songs. It’s true. As many an English professor will tell you: every story out there has already been written, you just have to find your own way to write it.

So Avatar ripping off other movies isn’t scandalous. It’s just curious and, at times, obvious. To prove this, my DH and I have compiled a list of all the movies we noticed (striking) similarities to. This is just our opinion, so don’t get in a tizzy if you bow down at the feet of the great James Cameron. This is purely for fun.

SPOILER ALERT! (Read no further if you haven’t seen the movie. I will ruin it here.)

List of Movies Avatar Ripped Off

1. Return of the Jedi: I’m not even a Star Wars junkie, and even I noticed that the fight scene at the end was straight-up Ewok. I was just waiting for one of the blue people from Pandora to jump into a robot machine like Chubaka and turn their weapons against them.

2. Braveheart: There were a lot of similarities during the ground war where the underdog blue people (called Navi) try to outsmart the opponent who outnumbers them. And really, when Sully gave that inspirational speech, I know part of you was expecting to hear they’ll never take “THEIR FREEDOM!”

3. Apocalypse Now: Come on, military guy gone rogue who’s lost all empathy for others? I was really hoping the crazy marine would just wink at the audience and say, “I love the smell of napalm in the morning.”

4. Last of the Mohicans & Dances With Wolves: White guy who fights alongside the natives— been done a lot. Actually, I think it would have been interesting if Sully wasn’t white. I mean he’s blue half the movie anyway, so why not mix is up, JC?

5. Independence Day: Michelle Rodriguez sacrificing herself by using her plane to try to blow up, for lack of a better term, the “mother ship.” And though Rodriguez was still typecast as a hard-nosed girl who can fight, it was refreshing to see her on the side of the good guys for once. All we needed to round out this movie homage was Bill Pullman declaring, “Today we celebrate our Independence Day!”

6. Thank You For Smoking: When Sigourney Weaver demanded a cigarette after getting out of the Avatar chamber, my first thought was: how much did the smoking lobbyists have to pay to get that in there? Hey, the money for that big budget had to come from somewhere. And I think we all know Philip Morris chipped in a good chunk.

So there you have it. And please take into account that this list is based purely on the movies we’ve actually seen, so it’s incomplete. Feel free to add to it because, really, the possibilities are endless. I mean, blue people = Smurfs, there are a lot of ways to take it.

POP CULTURE RANT: E!’s Fashion Police
Watching Joan Rivers back on the fashion police was like watching Dick Clark on New Year’s Rockin’ Eve— just sad. Please, retire this woman. Again. She not only has no right to be criticizing anyone else’s appearance (her pot’s not only black, but it’s plastic), but she has one of the most painful voices put on this Earth. It’s like Rachel Ray mixed with squawking crow. Get me back Debbie Matenopoulos, at least she’s cute and age appropriate (by several decades).

Teaser: A Glimpse Inside “The Ex BFF”

2010-01-13T13:37:00.005-05:00

So I’ve been beating my head against this book for so long, I’ve decided to break down and share a peek. It’s a blogging necessity really. When you spend so much time consumed by something, how can you not blog about it?

So below you’ll find two snippets from THE EX BFF (as the book is currently titled, it’s had many). For those who follow my blog, this is the novel I call my White Whale—mostly because it’s the first novel I ever wrote and it’s gone through so many revisions it’s barely recognizable to the first draft.

Now, some background. This is a “tween” novel, the girls are 13 and in the eighth grade. The book is told from four different girls points of view. Yup, count ‘em, FOUR. So below you’ll find a look inside Deirdre’s mind (who for all intents and purposes, is the “main” character). And you’ll find a look inside Allie’s mind (who’s one of Deirdre’s friends).

Both snippets are from the first 30 pages, and they are talking about the same “incident” though they have very different perspectives on it. I hope you like it. Enjoy!

THE EX BFF

DEIRDRE

You’d be surprised how much time a person can spend in bed. Deirdre was growing a newfound understanding for those enormously fat people who shut themselves into their homes, eating nonstop until they’re unable to move. If it weren’t for the constant visits from her father over the weekend, she could’ve easily boarded up the doors and windows. There were worst ways to go than eating oneself to death— think of all the cake she’d enjoy first.

Her bedroom door creaked open.

“Dad sent me to check on you,” her sister said, sounding bored. “You still crying?”

Deirdre wiped her eyes. “No,” she croaked.

Truthfully, she’d cried so much since that phone call on Friday that she was probably suffering from dehydration. The way Amber sounded, what she said, it twisted Deirdre’s heart in a way that kept the tears on a constant flow. It was as if her body ached from the rejection.

Nikki swished her glossy hair over her shoulder as she dropped onto the rickety desk chair. “Why are you fighting with Amber? I thought it was Becca who hated you.”

Deirdre ground her teeth. Everyone loved her sister— boys, girls, mailmen, dentists, stray dogs. Nikki had no idea what it was like to panic that any wrong step, any misspoken word, would give someone not just reason to hate you, but to make everyone else in the universe hate you too. That’s what that phone call really meant. They might as well have mailed a dead fish to her doorstep, because the call was a warning that the drama had just begun.

ALLIE

It wasn’t even eight a.m. and already Allie felt bored with the school’s latest gossip. Of course, given that the rumors had to do with Becca that was to be expected.

“Oh. My. God! I cannot believe Deirdre!” squealed Joanna Goldstein, spit misting from her lips onto the school’s bathroom mirror.

Allie cringed. She hated the sound of her friend’s voice— all lispy and high pitched, like a drunken French poodle.

“She tried to steal Lyle away from Becca! Can you believe it? Like, sheriously, that would ever happen,” Joanna continued, her speech impediment sputtering through. “Amber was so right for dropping her. I heard she wantsh nothing to do with her, and Becca’s obviously pished. What do you think we should do?”

Gee, here’s a thought, Joanna. Maybe you could think for yourself for once. Allie sighed. She had elevated Joanna from the slobbery kid classmates called “rain shower,” to one of the coolest girls in school. At first it was fun, making over the nerd like they do in the movies. And it was nice having someone hang on her every word for a change. But eventually, being expected to tell someone what to do every second of every day gets exhausting.

-------------------------------------------

There you go, the first look inside my latest WIP. I’ll keep you posted if anything interesting happens with it.

POP CULTURE RANT: General Hospital
I am now officially going to say that I think James Franco sort of sucked in this soap opera experiment of his. I don't know what he was hoping to get out of it. But he really over-acted his part. Every line he said came with a cheesy look. And wow, were some of his lines cheesy--to the point I think they may have been going for comedy at some points. "Assume the position, Jason." Really, GH. Really? They should have just had them make out--with "Mad World" playing in the background.

Curious Observations About Living in Suburbia

2010-01-07T12:11:00.003-05:00

So in the 48 days I’ve been living with “Those Who Will House Me ‘Til Then,” I’ve noticed some odd things. Not about my hosts, who are lovely, but about the world of picket fences and snow shoveling. You know, I’m a city girl. At least I have been since I moved out of my parents’ house. So I thought I’d compile a list of how different it is to live in a community without police sirens and stores within walking distance.

So without further ado, I’d like to introduce you all to my:

List of Curious Observations About Living in Suburbia

1. The gym here doesn’t provide towels. Really? You can’t throw some cheap white hand towels in the wash each day?

2. People shop at Target. A lot.

3. When you’re at the grocery store only buying a can of pumpkin, corn bread, and heavy cream, at least three people will stop and ask you what you’re making. Many more cooks in this world.

4. You can’t walk anywhere. Even the end of the driveway seems far.

5. Starbucks not providing free Internet access is much more annoying here because your alternative options are very limited.

6. My cat thinks deer are awesome.

7. There are stores in the local mall (Bakers?) that I was certain went out of business in the late ‘80s.

8. There’s more snow to shovel. Though oddly, the streets seem to get plowed faster than they ever did in Philadelphia (I’m talking to you, Mayor Nutter).

9. It’s much harder to find yoga.

10. There is no need for an alarm clock because woodpeckers will wake you every day at 7 a.m. They are evil little birds.

11. Food prices seem insanely low. I don’t even want to tell you what I was paying for an apple in the city.

12. A girl who once hated to drive has now found herself blowing through town in an enormous flat-bed truck. People change, folks!

So there you have it. My current list of odd observations, which I’m sure will grow in the months ahead while I wait for that construction crew to hurry up and put my drywall in already. Though before I move, I will create a bucket list of “Things I Must Do Before Leaving the Suburbs.” Maybe you all can help me get started. Any suggestions? And before you ask, yes, “Eating at the Olive Garden” is already on it.

POP CULTURE RANT: Comcast & Verizon
This isn’t a rant so much as helpful hint since I’m on the topic of curious observations. Did you know that if you call Comcast to complain about your cable, they’ll give you free stuff? No joke. My DH just finagled 6 months of free HBO and Showtime. Let’s repeat: FREE. And then he called Verizon and got the phone bill of “Those Who Will House Me ‘Til Then” lowered by more than $20/month. Though I will admit my DH is very patient and lives by the Power of Nice, something I find hard to do when talking to customer service reps.

Get to Know a Mean Girl with GCC Member Eileen Cook

2010-01-04T12:15:00.002-05:00

Oh, I love a good mean girl story. Forget making sequels to Karate Kid and Fame, Hollywood should do a remake of Heathers. You can’t go wrong with Christian Slater and Winona Ryder offing the popular girls. Well, unless you’re reading the new YA novel, GETTING REVENGE ON LAUREN WOOD, by GCC member Eileen Cook. The book’s got a Barbie on the cover! With a knife in her plastic back! How awesome is that? So check it out, it just debuted this week through Simon Pulse.

As always, here’s a little bit about her book to get you hooked:

Popularity is the best revenge.
In the final weeks of eighth grade, Lauren Wood made a choice. She betrayed her best friend, Helen, in a manner so publicly humiliating that Helen had to move to a new town just to save face. Ditching Helen was worth it, though, because Lauren started high school as one of the It Girls--and now, at the start of her senior year, she's the cheerleading captain, the quarterback's girlfriend, and the undisputed queen bee. Lauren has everything she's ever wanted, and she has forgotten all about her ex-best friend.

But Helen could never forget Lauren. After three years of obsessing, she's moving back to her old town. She has a new name and a new look, but she hasn't dropped her old grudges. She has a detailed plan to bring down her former BFF by taking away everything that's ever been important to Lauren—starting with her boyfriend.

Watch out, Lauren Wood. Things are about to get bitchy.

Here’s what Eileen had to say:

Q: In AMOR AND SUMMER SECRETS, Mariana discovers a hidden family secret. Are you a good secret keeper?

Eileen: I want to be a good secret keeper- does that count? I am the world’s worst liar. I could never go into a life of crime. I could keep the secret unless someone started asking too many questions and then the gig would be up.

Q: What is the favorite place you ever traveled to, and what was the coolest thing you saw/did there?

Eileen: I love to travel too! London is my favorite city to return to, but an all time favorite place to visit was Egypt. We did a ton of cool things including camel rides through the desert and going into the giant pyramid.

Q: I often tell the story of how a psychic once predicted that I would go on to write children’s books. Have you ever visited a psychic?

Eileen: My first book was called Unpredictable and it is about a woman who pretends to be a psychic in order to give a fake prediction to her ex-boyfriend’s new girlfriend. When I was researching the book I went to over a dozen psychics. There were a few things they predicted that came true- but I’m not sure if it was because they were good psychics or if they would have come true anyway. I think going to a psychic can be fun, but you have to find your own way in life.

Q: My character Mariana spends her summer in Puerto Rico connecting with her father’s heritage. Have you ever researched your family tree?

Eileen: My parents are both interested in their family histories so I’ve lucked out in getting to see all this neat history without having to do any of the research work myself. I have some pictures of my grandfather in college (he went to Notre Dame in the late 1920’s) that I love. I’ve been to Ireland where my family is from, but the house my grandmother grew up in was torn down to make a gas station. Hard to feel too sentimental about a gas station.

Q: Where were you when you found out that your book was going to be published?

Eileen: When I heard my first book was going to be published I was at home waiting for the car repair place to call and give me the bad news on what my costs were going to be. I had been planning in my mind for so long what it would be like to get the call, down to what I would be wearing and how I would act, that when it finally happened it didn’t even seem real. I’m pretty sure my agent thought I was taking heavy medications. I was very calm, all “yes, I see. Mmm-hmm. That sounds good.” I hung up the phone and kept thinking. “this is it. this is it,” but it took forever to sink in.
Thank you, Eileen! Now, everyone go out and buy books, lots and lots of books!

Just in Time for Christmas: Haiku Reviews for the Holidays

2009-12-22T12:11:00.004-05:00

So it’s Christmas week, and I know each and every one of you has your gifts wrapped in matching themed paper, your dinner menus planned with place cards scripted in Old English calligraphy, your cookies baked and covered in sprinkles, and your cards signed and mailed to everyone who attended your wedding (insert laughter here). But seriously, some of you may still be looking for a last-minute gift, so why not think BOOKS!

Judging by the amount of a coupons I’ve been emailed from Borders lately, we’re on the same page (at this point, I think their stock is 30% off too). And the clever folks at IndieBound would like to remind you that, “A Scented Candle Never Changed Anyone’s Life.” So don’t just buy your milk local, buy your books local too.

And to help you out, I’m dipping into my big Santa bag of tricks to create some Haiku Reviews that might inspire you to pick up a book for that special someone. Because nothing says “Ho! Ho! Ho!” more than kids fighting to the death. Um, Catching Fire...

My Haiku Reviews

CATCHING FIRE by Suzanne Collins
Survivor All Stars
revolt and die in the ring
Can’t wait for book three

THE NAUGHTY LIST by Suzanne Young (advanced reader’s copy)
Meg Cabot humor
with some Sex Kittens thrown in
Cutest book ever

BEST FRIENDS FOREVER by Jennifer Weiner
Sweet and nostalgic
A high school reunion meets
Thelma and Louise

PROPHECY OF THE SISTERS by Michelle Zink
End of days is near
Modern day gothic novel
Like the evil twin

THE LATKE WHO COULDN’T STOP SCREAMING, A CHRISTMAS STORY by Lemony Snicket
Chrismukkah on crack
For those who celebrate both
This book is way fun

Feel free to leave your own Haiku reviews in the comments. I’m always looking for book recommendations to spend my coupons on!

POP CULTURE RANT: General Hospital
I’ve waited as long as I could to say this, but the Franco storyline just isn’t grabbing me. You’d think an A-List celebrity doing a soap opera would be daytime gold, but so far it seems disconnected from the show. I don’t care about this character at all. And Jason fighting yet another threat to “his family” on the heels of Alcazar, Manny, the Russians, Jerry Jax, just seems played out. I wish the writers had done something else with “Franco.” Because right now, the Liz-Lucky-Nick triangle is more interesting. And this is coming from a Sam fan.

It’s a Chrismukkah Miracle!

2009-12-14T11:23:00.003-05:00

Oh, Chrismukkah! Oh, Chrismukkah! How lovely are your candles! For those who don’t know, my DH and I are rocking the interfaith marriage. He’s Jewish, I’m Catholic, and for the past 11 years, we’ve pretty much perfected the menorah/Santa hybrid holiday we call Chrismukkah. But this holiday season, we’re staying with “Those Who Will House Me ‘Til Then,” so there have been lots of inquiries as to whether we can pull off the season in temporary digs.

Now it must be said that I am a Christmas freak. I can’t help it. I was raised by a Christmas freak. My sister’s a Christmas freak, my aunt’s a freak. The seasonal sickness has a long and lengthy family history. So I am publicly admitting that there are seven large Home Depot plastic garage tubs in our basement labeled “Christmas.” We’ve got inside decorations, outside decorations, ornaments, lights, wreaths, you name it.

Add to that, two menorahs, two Chrismukkah books (Yes, they actually make these. We got them as gifts), and plenty of challah. Plus, we also go to the DH’s annual family Hanukkah party, which was this past Saturday.

So our Chrismukkah-filled weekend went something like this:

FRIDAY
- Lit candles for first night of Hanukkah with DH’s parents and grandma. Blessed the wine, blessed the challah, ate chicken, gave each other candy.
- Went to friend’s birthday party in Philly and drank a little more wine— this wine was not blessed (accept by Napa sommeliers).

SATURDAY
- Went to Home Depot, bought seven-foot Christmas tree (I like Noble firs), and plopped it in one of the cool foot petal stands.
- Went to Hanukkah party, brought fruit salad, lit candles for second night of Hanukkah, ate latkes, exchanged Pollyanna gifts (got an iTunes gift card, gave a Philosophy gift set).

SUNDAY
- Decorated Christmas tree with my husband’s Jewish family. How nice are they? They even listened to Christmas carols as they hung the Potterybarn crystal snowflakes.
- Ate sushi and latkes.
- Baked Christmas cookies. My signature cookie is the Maple Lace (they’re these lacey oatmeal cookies sandwiched with melted chocolate).
- Watched the Eagles game. They won! And they’re in first place, officially making it a Chrismukkah miracle!

POP CULTURE RANT: Eagles
How awesome was that Eagles-Giants game last night? I cheered, I panicked, I bit my nails. And to top off their win, the Cowboys lost (Thank you, San Diego!). But, I will say I was a little shocked by all the punches. I mean, what good is it throwing a punch at someone wearing a helmet and a few tons of protective pads? It’s a wasted effort that will only get you thrown from the game. Whether you’re winning or losing, don’t be a jerk about it. This isn’t hockey.

* Those are photos of my actual tree and actual Hanukkah party, slightly blurred to protect my pint-sized relatives. It is the Internet, folks.

My New York State of Mind

2009-12-08T16:10:00.002-05:00

Ah, Manhattan at Christmas time, gotta love it. Of course when I lived in Times Square and my roommate worked at Rockefeller Center, she swore we “lived in Christmas hell.” The crowds can be rather aggressive, you know? But still, it’s very pretty.

And I’m proud to report that I even got a little snow when I visited this weekend. I felt just like that Alabama song.

“By now in New York City… There’s snow on the ground…” Christmas in Dixie

Anyway, as a former resident and current tourist of the great city of New York, I have a few observations to share.

Things I Noticed About Christmas in NYC This Year:

1. You won the World Series! Does anyone remember that? Because Philly does, painfully. Yet you can walk around Manhattan for days and see no evidence of the Yankee’s accomplishment. There are no signs in the windows, no banners in store displays, no flags on cars. If the fans really care that little, I think we should take back championship.

2. We found a rockin’ four-star hotel on Lastminutetravel.com for $179. Considering NY prices, that’s practically free. And our place had a bedroom, two bathrooms, a living room, a kitchen and a dining room! I’m not joking. It was extended stay that was bigger than my friends’ apartments.

3. Takashimaya, the Japanese department store, has the best selection of under $25 Pollyanna gifts ever! There was a Lego calculator, a funky paper wallet, an engraved silver NYC subway map, typewriter key cufflinks. You name the random crap, and it’s got it!

4.The tree at Rockefeller Center has no ornaments. Was it always that way?

5. The price of a caricature in Central Park has gone down from $20 to $15. See, the economy has affected everyone.

6. We found three—count ‘em THREE—free parking spots over the weekend. We didn’t pay for parking once. The odds of that happening are about as good as me winning the lottery, maybe I should play…

7. If you go to the Met, you don’t actually have to pay $20 per adult (as the sign says). It’s just a “suggested donation.” You can just give them $5 if you want. Really.

8. There are “bridal consultants” in the J.Crew in Rockefeller Center.

9. The ring that inspired my engagement ring is no longer at Tiffany’s. (Six years ago, my DH took the Tiffany specs of that ring to a jeweler in the Diamond District and had the ring recreated for much less. He’s so smart.)

10. I'm mad old. At one point while visiting a college friend, I realized we had just spent thirty minutes discussing furniture and the prices at Pottery Barn. That's sad, folks. We used to do shots.

POP CULTURE RANT: Shrek the Halls
Okay, I think this is officially the best modern Christmas movie in existence. If you haven’t seen it, rent it. Now. It’s really funny. And as always, my favorite character is Puss ‘n Boots. If you’ve got a cat, you’ll find this clip funny. “I’ve shamed myself.”

GCC Member Debbie Rigaud breaks barriers at Simon Pulse

2009-12-04T10:52:00.002-05:00

I’m excited to introduce everyone to GCC member Debbie Rigaud, who has a breakthrough young adult novel debuting through Simon Pulse. PERFECT SHOT! marks the first book in the Simon Pulse Romantic Comedies series to feature an African-American protagonist and to be written by an African-American. Talk about breaking down some barriers! And to make Debbie even cooler, she lives in Bermuda. Jealous, yet? Okay, so let’s talk about her novels.

As always, here’s a little bit about her book to get you hooked:

What’s the wackiest thing you’ve ever done after a crush attack?

High school athlete London Abrams is more likely to spike a volleyball than wear spike heels. Yet in one crush-tastic moment, she signs up for a modeling contest as an excuse to meet the photo intern Brent St. John. But instead of getting a call back from Brent, London gets a call back from contest judges! Now she’s in a fierce modeling competition feeling way out of her league, and Brent’s camera is zoomed in to document everything. Suddenly, London’s not feeling so ready for her close up.

Here’s what Debbie had to say:

Q: In AMOR AND SUMMER SECRETS, Mariana discovers a hidden family secret. Are you a good secret keeper?

Debbie: I try to be. I look at it this way, there are too many people spilling secrets and feeling okay about it, just because they convince themselves that it's okay to tell one trustworthy person. That one person then tells their one trustworthy person and so on. Pretty soon, everyone knows that secret.

Very perceptive. I think that IS how many secrets are spread.

Q: What is the favorite place you ever traveled to, and what was the coolest thing you saw/did there?

Debbie: Ghana, West Africa. It was such a culturally and spiritually enriching vacation. The coolest thing about my trip was vibing with the people. From friendly teen students, knowledgeable tour guides, market vendors, hip hop MC's and talented dressmakers (who hooked me up with gorgeous traditional dresses), I was given the warmest welcome.

Sounds like an AMAZING trip! I must add Ghana to my list of must-see places!

Q: I often tell the story of how a psychic once predicted that I would go on to write children’s books. Have you ever visited a psychic?

Debbie: Yes, I have visited a psychic before. I went with friends, which made it more fun. I'm totally fascinated by all things paranormal. Ironically, I absolutely don't like getting predictions. Predictions mess with my head. I'm afraid of hearing anything unpleasant, like when I was told that my college boyfriend wasn't "the one." At the time, I really wanted him to be and didn't want to hear anything to the contrary.

Q: My character Mariana spends her summer in Puerto Rico connecting with her father’s heritage. Have you ever researched your family tree?

Debbie: Sad to say, but I haven't yet visited Haiti, the place my parents were born. But I adore everything about the vibrant Haitian heritage I inherited. In researching my family, I've learned that my relatives left their mark on Haitian history. For example, my dad's great great grandfather played a role in the Haitian Revolution. My dad even pointed out the page where our great-great-great grandad's photo was included in his school history books. Pretty cool.

Q: Where were you when you found out that your book was going to be published?
Debbie: I was on vacation in Accra, Ghana with my husband. We stopped by this tiny but crowded Internet cafe in the heart of the busy capitol one night. That's where I read my agent's email announcing my book deal. I was mad excited, but I kept cool until I exited the café, so as not to cause a scene and incite panic in such a tight space. Once outside, I told the hubby and we celebrated over chilled bottles of pineapple juice.

Thank you, Debbie! Now, everyone go out and buy books, lots and lots of books!

Hi, My Name’s Diana, And I Didn’t Like New Moon

2009-11-30T15:33:00.002-05:00

It’s painful to admit it. And I know it’s unpopular. But I have chosen to confess publicly that I did not enjoy the big screen version of The Twilight Saga: New Moon. Like, I thought the special effects guys should get a raise and the director should have to sit in time-out and “think about what he did wrong.”

SPOILER ALERT: If you have not read the book(s), please lift that rock above your head and read no further. Because I’m going to delve into plot points.

DOUBLE SPOILER: Also, if you haven’t seen the movie, plan to do so, and don’t want me to ruin it with my critical opinions, stop here.

Okay, so let me first say that I love the Twilight book franchise. I’ve read them all more than once, and I even own the DVD of the Twilight movie.

Now given that, I had some problems with the first movie, namely the special effects--like, I honestly laughed when Edward jumped from his bedroom to that tree and they looked like they were suspended with the Peter Pan wire from your community’s last theater production. I also thought the love story was rushed in Twilight and could have used a few extra scenes to better show the evolution of their relationship from strangers to soul mates.

However, comparatively speaking, I have now come to appreciate Catherine Hardwicke’s vision. She was creative, she was edgy, and she went off script (or off book). She gave you fun relevant scenes that weren’t in the novel. Like the vampires killing that guy in the fishing boat. Like the opening with the deer in the woods. Like the “Say it, out loud. Vampire,” scene. And her montages during Bella’s lullaby and the ballet studio, all gave viewers peeks into moments we didn’t get to experience as readers.

Chris Weitz, however, showed the creativity a tree stump. If Stephenie didn’t write it, we didn’t see it (with the exception of one brief fight scene with Felix in the Volturi chamber).

When the movie opened with Bella’s dream of her grandmother, my heart sank with disappointment. It was so boring compared to the deer in the woods. Or even the glimpse of Bella in Arizona. Those “extra” scenes in Twilight made me excited for the rest of the movie.

The dream was dull. I would have much rather have had a montage of Bella and Edward all happy and in love during the summer, something readers never got to enjoy. Show us the honeymoon period, so the impending loss would be more dramatic. My DH didn’t even realize that New Moon was supposed to be set in a new school year, he thought it was the day after the end of Twilight.

And Bella's depression? I can't believe they just had her sit in a chair and flash the names of the months. It was a great technique in the book, but for a movie, I would have rather seen Renee show up and try to pack her things, the doctor call her comotose, her dad frustrated by her pain. Something blurry and warped through the lens of her depression.

And don't even get me started on the quickie rush through the Volturi. After the millions of trailers, I thought (hoped) half the film would be in Italy. And it should have been. Michael Sheen as Aro rocked to the point he should get a spin-off prequel: “Twilight: The Rise of the Volturi.” But no, we were in and out of there.

Overall, halfway through, the DH turned to me and said “this movie sucks.” And I have to agree. It was just too literal. I know as a reader and an author, I should appreciate a movie being so closely tied to the novel. But I felt it was just missing that “movieness,” that little something extra that captures the essence of the book without boring you with a page-by-page Cliff’s Notes synopsis.

So props to the special effects guys—those wolves were awesome! And props to the make up people because all of the actors looked unbelievably better—the Cullens no longer look like the Adam’s family. And props to the actors for doing the best with what they had (this includes Taylor’s abs).

But thumbs down to the director for giving us a film with no more artistic vision than a play-by-play on SportsCenter. Let’s hope the director of Eclipse, David Slade, has a bit more spunk. I want some advanced glimpses of that newborn vampire army, and a heck of a montage of the vampire wars in the South.

But nevermind me, what about you guys? Did you love New Moon? What grabbed you or what didn't? And what would you like from the next film?